14 June 2024

Sex advice

Awkward questions between friends: 10 reasons to talk about sexuality with your friends

Do you have awkward and intimate questions that are playing on your mind? Why is talking about sexuality with friends the key?

Ah, sex! What a fascinating subject… Sex is everywhere: on television, on the internet, in magazines, on billboards and above all in our lives. Advertisers and media brands have understood this well: the pleasures of the flesh give meaning to our existence, making it the perfect subject to capture our attention.

Have you ever imagined life without sex? Wouldn't life be duller? Would it really be worth living? Sex is an exceptional experience. It helps you understand the other person better and share a unique moment of pleasure.

Ultimately, sexuality is the one thing on this planet that allows us to merge completely with another person and form a harmonious whole, isn't it?

Yes, sexuality brings real pleasure, extraordinary and unique sensations. Yet it isn't always synonymous with positive emotions: anxiety, stress, negative experiences, insecurities…

Sex is an integral part of life. It's a topic that comes up naturally in conversation, yet can sometimes be awkward to bring up. Here at ONY, we encourage you to open up to the people around you. Here are 10 reasons why you should talk about sexuality with your friends.

1) Separating fiction from reality

This world is extraordinary in many ways. Take pornography, for example.

Since the arrival of streaming videos in 2005, it has become very easy to access adult content online. We even talk about the porn generation — all those young people who gained access very early on to images mass-distributed by the pornography industry.

And we all know it: pornography is very different from real life and sex in general.

Yes indeed, extreme positions and practices — pornography influences our habits in the bedroom. So be careful not to reproduce behaviours or scenes from adult films that could lead you into all sorts of mistakes…

So, rather than letting porn images obsess you and trying to recreate them during sex, wouldn't it be wiser to first talk to a friend about it?

In any case, your friend will be your compass. They'll know how to guide you and help you separate fact from fiction.

2) Getting closer to your friends

Talking about sex with friends is a great way to get to know yourself better. Because, at the end of the day, it's always more captivating to talk about sexuality with your best friend than to chat about the weather, don't you think?

"On your side, be equally curious about the people who share your life."

Talk honestly, speak about the intimate — everything that touches you on the inside, unfiltered. Discussing these topics demonstrates mutual trust. Nothing better to bring you closer together and strengthen the bonds of friendship.

On your side, be equally curious about the people who share your life.

3) Getting to know yourself better

It is often difficult to understand yourself better without an outside perspective from a friend.

Talking about sex with friends is also a way to encourage each other to explore your sexuality and to better understand your own personality.

When you start a conversation with a friend, you have the opportunity to share your tastes, your fantasies and compare notes. During that conversation, you can cover all sorts of life questions — from physical preferences to love in general, to sex… You can draw real insights from these exchanges and perhaps even discover new fantasies, desires and inclinations…

Ultimately, being able to talk with someone you trust opens up many opportunities for mutual learning. You may also discover that you have plenty of things in common with your friend.

You'll better understand your needs as well as your limits when it comes to intimacy.

4) Reassuring each other, supporting one another

Sexuality plays a central role at every stage of life. It teaches you about yourself and others. It helps you grow, quite simply.

Single or in a relationship? Talking with a friend helps you put your concerns into words.

Single?

For single people, social pressure is often intense. There's always the expectation of having plenty of conquests and performing well during sex.

In a relationship?

In a relationship, sex is sometimes seen as the glue that holds things together. There is therefore a fear of not satisfying your partner, or of them not meeting your expectations.

Friends Im Scared GIFfrom Friends GIFs

5) Safety first

Do you have eczema on your penis? Or itchy testicles? This kind of mishap happens more often than you'd think.

Your friend is the first person to turn to for advice. They will be your greatest ally.

If you have health-related questions or concerns, your friend is the person you can turn to first — perhaps even before your family. This companion will be your confidant and your most valuable source of support.

Of course, your friend won't replace the advice of a sex therapist or a doctor.

6) Share your juicy anecdotes

On the agenda for your catch-up with your childhood friends: beer, crisps and your incredible naughty story from last night.

Yes, you met someone and something rather unusual happened (we'll say no more — let your imagination do the work)… It's only natural to want to share that kind of gossip with your best, isn't it?

Over a table, dissect that incredible story that kept you awake until the early hours…

Eyes and ears wide open, your friends munching on crisps or smoking a cigarette, hanging on your every word. You have every opportunity to back up your story with a few well-placed jokes that are sure to land with your audience.

Laughing Black GIFfrom Laughing GIFs

Yes, there's a little gossip in all of us.

7) Awkward questions: better to talk to a friend than… Your parents?

Of course, we don't all have the same relationship with our parents. Some are cordial, others much closer.

In any case, it can be useful to talk with your parents. They'll want to protect you and guide you with the best intentions in the world…

On the other hand, unfortunately, emotions quickly take over within the family bubble. Worry can soon become overwhelming for your parents, causing them to lose all objectivity and their ability to give sound advice.

And let's be honest — our parents are from a different generation. They won't necessarily have the same approach, or the same understanding of a situation and its realities.

So there is nothing more valuable than chatting with friends. Your best will be able to discuss the things that are on your mind, keep the conversation light, and above all they'll be comfortable even with the most awkward questions.

8) Getting advice

No, you don't know everything in life.

Talking with a friend can be extremely enriching when it comes to sexuality, even when the questions are awkward. Because chatting with your mate will give you plenty of answers to your questions. Some people have knowledge that others don't — makes sense, doesn't it?

Having a problem in the bedroom with your partner? Not sure how to handle it? How to solve it? Ask your closest friends and you'll soon find the answer!

9) Overcoming your… Sexual insecurities

Do you have a small penis? Do you come too quickly? Do you sometimes struggle to climax during sex? Sex can be a stressful and anxiety-inducing subject. These insecurities can invade and affect our lives.

Yet you are surely not the only one in that situation. By talking about these topics with the people around you, you'll already feel less alone. And with a bit of luck, you'll come across someone who has the same insecurities as you.

What's more, simply talking about your insecurities with friends helps you put them in perspective and free yourself from them. And let's face it, we all love having a laugh with our friends, don't we? Being able to approach your insecurities with lightness and humour often helps you overcome them…

10) Sharing a trauma

Bad sexual or romantic experiences sometimes happen in life: betrayal, failure, assault…

Sharing traumatic experiences with someone you trust helps reduce their weight and the impact they have on your life. Putting a painful memory into words is a way to free yourself from it.

→ Read also: 15 fascinating facts about morning erections

Key takeaways on the benefits of asking awkward questions between friends

Talking to your friends about awkward topics isn't always easy. But push through the discomfort and you'll soon notice the benefits. In reality, it's very often extremely rewarding. Indeed, sharing your intimate life helps break taboos and creates a space of trust where you can speak openly and honestly, without fear of being judged. By sharing your concerns, your experiences and your questions, you may realise you're not alone in feeling the way you do. Reassuring, isn't it?

Moreover, discussing sexuality with friends can offer a different perspective, valuable advice, and even useful information to better understand your own desires and needs. It's also an opportunity to learn from one another, dispel misconceptions and adopt a healthy, respectful attitude in your intimate life. By questioning certain clichés or stereotypes, you can broaden your outlook and deepen your knowledge in this area.

Finally, exchanging on these topics with your friends can strengthen emotional bonds and friendship. By creating a space of support and mutual trust, of listening and acceptance, you contribute to a better understanding of yourself and others. It's an opportunity to feel understood and supported in your questions and personal experiences, which is equally comforting.

In conclusion, discussing awkward questions about sexuality with your friends can be hugely enriching on many levels: breaking taboos, gaining different perspectives, strengthening friendships and above all better understanding yourself. So don't hesitate to start those conversations — they can be so beneficial for everyone.

Friends are everything:)